What happened in Orlando.

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After the death of Christina Grimmie last Friday night, and the tragic shooting on Saturday night/Sunday morning, I feel overcome with grief and sadness. I have spent these past few days trying to wrap my head around these events, and I can't. I feel like I'm back in fifth grade, watching the footage of the planes crash into the World Trade Center over and over again. I was so confused then. Why did the planes crash? Didn't they know there were people in those buildings? How do you accidentally fly a plane into a building? Wait, it wasn't an accident? Someone did this on purpose? I thought bad guys were only in movies?

This time, though, I know the bad guys exist. I have read countless theories as to why the shooter did what he did, but I still am so confused. I don't understand how someone-the shooter from Saturday, the coward from Friday, the shooters in San Bernadino, the men that flew the planes on September 11th, the countless tragedies that happen each week because of hate and the inability to understand-I don't understand how a person can have so much hatred in their heart to affect, ruin, or end the lives of innocent people.

We suspect that the events on Saturday were an act of hatred again the gay community. I have read countless comments on articles that make me so proud to be a part of this country; there have been more posts about mourning the loss of the victims than posts about the "lifestyle" they chose to lead. And I have read several posts on Facebook that have assured me that the people I have chosen and continue to choose to surround myself with are the kind of people that I want to be tied to forever. I can confidently say that I know some really great people in the world. For the most part, there has been nothing but love and support for the victims and their families pouring from social media and the news outlets, and for that, I am so grateful.

But I read a post this morning that made me have to stop and think twice. One that showed more anger at the events than grief and sadness. And I support it. This person's post spoke to the fact that only one man pulled the trigger that night, but there is so much harm and hate toward the gay community on a daily basis. 

My question is, what gives one group of people the right to degrade, hate, or criticize another group's way of living? What would give any person the right to think that their way of life, and the choices they make, make them superior to any other person who may do things a little differently? This is America, and part of what makes our country so great is that we are allowed to have our own opinions. We are allowed to live differently than our neighbors, and still be accepted by others. The problem comes when certain people or groups of people are unable to allow others to live the way they choose. They don't even have to accept "the other way," they just have to be okay with other people not living the same life as them, but for some, and for who knows what reason, that's a hard concept to grasp. And I'm not just talking about sexual orientation. This goes for race, religion, sexual orientation, parenting styles, personal preferences, and basically just about everything else that makes a person who they are.

People disagree on things all the time, right? I personally like tomatoes, Brandon doesn't. I don't necessarily understand why he doesn't like tomatoes, but I feel okay about the fact that he doesn't like tomatoes, because that doesn't mean that I can't like them. On a deeper note, people disagree about politics literally all the time, and we somehow still find a way to work together, go to school together, and have relationships built on other things besides politics. Just because one person believes something doesn't mean that anyone standing in a ten foot radius of them has to believe the same thing. And it certainly doesn't mean that the two people can't be kind and cordial, or even friends with one another despite their difference in opinion.

So then why is a portion of the population not as accepting with certain lifestyles? If the Smith's eat dinner at 5:00, but the Miller's prefer to have dinner at 7:00, who should have to suffer here? Because everyone has to eat dinner at the same time, right?

I'm not afraid to state that I am in support of legalizing gay marriage. I have found so much happiness in my marriage to Brandon, and I want that for people that love...whoever they want, really. It would suck to have marriage in general taken away, so I say we give the right to anyone. A lot of gay couples have been together longer than married couples, even though they wouldn't even have to sign papers or go to court to separate. If they're committed, then why the heck not? The coolest part is, just because gay marriage is legal, that doesn't mean that I automatically have to divorce Brandon and marry a woman instead. Nope. My life changes literally not at all, and I get to be happy for all the people who have the newfound privilege of being tied (in a good way) to someone for the rest of their life.

I'm also in support of people choosing to be whatever religion they want to be. Brandon and I don't attend any church, but you can bet that no matter what religion our family and friends are, we would be right there supporting them at missionary farewells, bat mitzvahs, Lent, or whatever other things may be happening in their religious lives. And just because they are a part of their church, doesn't mean that we have to be. Just like we wouldn't force them to go to Disneyland on their Sabbath day (because anyone that knows us knows that is our church).

Some people might say that the events last weekend, and days past, could be fixed with gun control. I'm not even touching that subject, because who knows. What I do know, is that the issues could be stopped before they even happened if everyone just held a little more love in their hearts. I get that change is hard, and I get that it's not always easy to understand why a person chooses to live their life the way they do. One time Brandon put mayonnaise on a grilled cheese sandwich and I thought the world was going to come to an end. But, I got over it. Because if Brandon wants to put mayo on his grilled cheese, then he is entitled to that right. 

You know who wasn't okay with people living different lifestyles? Hitler. I'm just saying.

So do me a favor, and next time you feel like getting angry about the way someone lives their life, ask yourself if and how it affects you. And if it doesn't, let it go, move on, and learn to embrace the differences in those around you. The world would be an awfully boring place if we were all the same.

The fam comes to SoJo.

in

This past weekend was definitely a great way to kick off my summer. The weather was kind of crappy, but my family was able to come stay with us, which means we had family time with them two weekends in a row! I'm happy we have gotten to see them so much despite not living in the same town.

They came to Utah on Friday so my brother could go to student orientation at Utah State. He was tired by the end of the day, but he seemed excited too. If anything, all the swag they bought from the bookstore shows just how excited they all are. My parents bought matching Utah State Mom/Dad shirts, how cute is that? And they loaded our little nugget up with gear too, so he's ready for his first Utah State game! 

Friday night we got some ice cream and rented the movie 13 Hours. What I saw of it was good, but I fell asleep. Not surprising. Saturday morning we went to Gardner Village, somewhere I have been wanting to go since we moved here. We were looking for the farmers market there, but it ended up just being one tiny cart, so we walked through all the shops instead. It was the cutest place! I loved all their boutiques, especially the store with all the Christmas decor (does anyone else feel like it should be fall with all this rain and cooler weather?)! Then we went to get tickets for Now You See Me 2, went to Sizzler for lunch before the movie, and after the movie we just went home and relaxed. That night we played games and watched Zootopia, while they tried not to think about their five hour drive the next morning.

They left too early on Sunday, but I loved having them here! It's always fun to share our new home with them since they don't get to be too often. Before we know it, they'll be dropping Adrian off in Logan, then two of their three kids will be in Utah.

It was so weird that night to not have to dread going to work the next day, or worry about getting all the chores done, because I'm officially done with work for the summer!! The next seven weeks are mine to do whatever I please. Brandon took this week off too, so we've been making the most of our days together so far! Hope everyone is having a great week so far!

 

This was the best picture we managed to get all weekend. Excuse the belly, it's pizza, not a baby.

 

My thoughts on Facebook.

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Years ago, after Myspace was cool, I was sneaky and created a Facebook account, even though I wasn't supposed to. And for a while, Facebook was pretty cool. I got to see what my friends were up to, and share pictures of my own and have a place to keep them all (because either the cloud didn't exist yet or I was absolutely clueless about it. probably the latter).

Then, at some point, Facebook flipped and became filled with nothing but articles and videos that were titled something like "they thought they found a mouse on their doorstep. what happened next...incredible" and news articles about all the awful things going on in the world. (side note: every time I see one of those bait articles i want to punch myself in the face.) And then, not too long after Facebook became filled with mostly other things besides friend statuses and pictures from vacations or graduations or whatever, people decided that it was okay to continually post negative comments on literally everything. And THEN, this is probably worst of it all, Facebook changed it's feed style (again) so now, at least one comment from every single post automatically shows up as I scroll through. And the comments that show up somehow are always the most negative.

Now, I'm realizing as I write this, that the logical thing to do would probably just be to unfollow the four news stations that I do follow, but I don't watch the news, and I spend plenty of time on Facebook (far more than I should) so I feel like some dose of news is better than none. And there have also been plenty of times that I've told myself I should deactivate my Facebook, but I, like many people probably, can't bring myself to do it. So yes, I could change, I am acknowledging that, but that's not my point.

My point is, when did it become okay, or even the norm, for people to voice every single negative thought they have? I am all for people having opinions, because it makes us who we are and individuality is important, but what happened to "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all"? I see so many things on Facebook that people write that just make me mad, because generally, it's something that hardly involves them, or they are throwing some other population-whether it's another gender, race, nationality, or some other group of people-completely under the bus for not being involved in the article at all. For example: once I saw this article about a women who had been working for eighty years or something and had only taken like five sick days her whole life. And the very first comment on the article said something like "such a great story. millennials could really learn something from her." And I was so confused because the article didn't mention anything about this woman being better than anybody else, or having a better work ethic than the millennials, but for some reason, this guy decided to give an entire generation a hard time. It seemed uncalled for.

And then there's the fact that with the entire world having such easy access to news articles and being able to comment on them, suddenly one situation becomes everyone's business, and everyone has something to say about it. Like the whole gorilla issue. I get that news is news, but sometimes I feel like maybe they need to scale back and share other types of things? I'm not a journalist, obviously, but as an occasional reader/viewer of the news, I would rather read/hear about happy things going on in our country. Or maybe things that involve our nation as a whole, not just Joe Shmoe from Smalltown, USA.

I don't know, maybe I'm just being super pessimistic about it all, but I get so frustrated when people make negative comments just for the sake of putting their two cents in. There is enough negativity in the world! We don't need anymore!! 

What started me on this today was something small. I follow my favorite singer, Cassadee Pope on Facebook, and she has been posting things about the CMT Awards, and how she got to sing with Pitbull and Leona Lewis last night at the awards. Everything she has posted is about how last night was unbelievable and that she was so excited for the experience, because performing at the CMT Awards is a huge deal anyway, but to do it alongside two big names in music is even cooler. The first comment said "country isn't even country anymore. pitbull and leona lewis shouldn't be allowed at a country awards show." And like, I get where this person is coming from, and I guarantee that Cassadee Pope doesn't give two craps about this lady's opinion after being onstage last night, but why on earth does she think it's okay to write a negative comment and rain on somebody's parade? That would be like somebody posting a picture of their new dog and me commenting "i hate dogs, i'm very clearly a cat person." That wouldn't do anybody any good. And it's just annoying. I'm not important enough to try and make people have bad days.

The mom of one of my friends posts a positive thought every single day on Facebook, and I appreciate her so much. Actually, I'm going to tell her that as soon as I finish this post. There seriously is so much negativity that happens each day in the world, but it's incredible how one bright light can help the rest of us shine. I'm not one to leave you with a challenge, but I think it's important that we all think about how what we are saying can impact the rest of the world. We're all here together on this earth, so we might as well do our best to make it a positive place to be.

The last high school graduate!

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My baby bro graduated high school this past weekend!! He has been done with school for two weeks now, so I'm sure he has felt like a graduate for a while, but I can't believe that he is finally, actually done with high school. My mom had a poster of pictures of him since he was in kindergarten, and I realized this weekend that when I think about him, I still picture him as a cute little second grader. It's hard to believe he's all grown up now! But I am so excited, because he is going to Utah State in the fall, which means that we will live so close to each other!! He's going to hate how often I make him hang out with me haha.

Graduations are one of the times that the whole family gets together. My parents were there, obviously, but so were my grandparents, cousins, and some aunts and uncles. It was great to have some quality family time with every one. It's always a little crazy when we're together!

Being in Boise definitely made me miss it even more-living close to my family, all the things Brandon and I used to do there, all the things we didn't get the chance to do, etc.-so I'm super grateful that we have reasons to keep going back. But I am super happy that Adrian will be in the same state so I can have a little piece of home closer to me. He and my parents will be in Logan this weekend for SOAR (student orientation and registration) and I'm hoping they will be able to come down and stay with us for the weekend.

It's crazy to look at the pictures now, and the pictures that were taken at my graduation seven years ago and see how much the three of us have changed. Even between Anthony's graduation and now, he has grown up so much! It makes me excited to see what the future holds for us, but also a little sad that we're growing up so fast. Adrian will be starting college in the fall, Anthony is getting married in September, and we're having a baby a few months after. I honestly don't know how my parents are handling all the change so well! I'm not even the parent and I can hardly stand it!

 

Everything about this picture melts my heart. Adrian in his gown, Anthony's cheeser smile (which makes him look so old, what the heck!), my parents squinty smiles that I'm positive have more to do with pride and happiness than how sunny it was that day...

 

Look at what a difference just a few years makes!!

And the difference of seven years. They were so little!!

California: round 2.

in

Our Memorial Day weekend was spent the way most of our marriage has and will be spent: with Mickey. This was a nice follow-up vacation to our spring break (read post here), because last time we only did the actual Disneyland park. This time, we did California Adventure, and also went to Universal Studios!

Friday afternoon we hopped in the car with our friends Alyssa and Jake, and made the long drive to Vegas. It went quickly, actually, so it wasn't too bad! Saturday morning we were up at five, and on the road by six! We finally made it to the park around 10:30, and were so surprised that it wasn't even close to being hot outside. Thankfully, the sun came out a little later, which I was super happy about because 1: it had been pretty cool in Utah still until that weekend, and 2: I was able to enjoy my traditional Mickey ice cream bar! We got corn dogs, spent a ton of time in Cars Land, rode Toy Story Mania twice, and had bomb seats for World of Color that night. And we of course got to take pictures for our fun little gender reveal. My favorite part was actually giving the balloons away to these three little brothers that were hanging out in the same area as us. They were super excited about them!

That night we drove to our hotel in Burbank, which was a super great idea on our part, because we didn't feel like we had to rush to wake up the next morning in order to drive to the park. We slept in a little, then made the quick drive to Universal. Our first stop obviously was the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. We loved it so much in Florida that we had to go to the one in California asap.

First stop was to take pictures with the conductor of the Hogwarts Express. Guys, I don't know if he was actually British or not, but he had a full on conversation with us and I felt like I was in London. Everyone but me was wearing a shirt or robe that indicated their house, but the conductor guessed that I was a Hufflepuff, and said that you can just tell. Then he launched into this story about how the founder of Hogsmeade was a Hufflepuff, and how we wouldn't be there today if it weren't for him and I was seriously crying. I'm just waiting for J.K. Rowling to expose herself as the designated historian for the magic world because I'm pretty positive that everything she writes is true.

Anyway, we got butterbeer immediately after that (which, in itself is magic), and I was thrilled. You know the feeling you get, like when you try and remember something really awesome or really tasty, but you know that remembering just doesn't do it justice? That's how my relationship with butterbeer has been for the past eighteen months. But I'm also sure that my saying "UGH THIS IS SO GOOD" at a higher than normal volume was just an echo of what everyone around me was thinking, so no, I'm not even ashamed. We stood in line for The Forbidden Journey after that (an hour wait outside, plus more time inside) but were given the magical powers of the wizarding world once we got inside and a staff member told us to go to the front-of-the-line line and say "Expecto Patronum." Guys. We got to skip the rest of the line inside and go straight to the front. I'm pretty sure he overheard us talking about the benefits of staying in line to see the castle (mostly for the benefit of prego me, who couldn't actually ride the ride) versus jumping in the single rider line, but I don't even care what his motive was. It made our whole day.

After the ride, we were starving, so we headed to the Three Broomsticks (casually, you know, as we would do on any other day in Hogsmeade) for a delicious, English lunch. And more butterbeer. I made a goal to drink at least five butterbeers that day, and am super disappointed in myself that I only actually made it through two and a half. I started out with gusto, drank a whole one by myself, then the entire rest of the day, Brandon and I just shared. So we'll just have to go back! We wandered through the shops, rode Flight of the Hippogriff, wandered through more shops, and then finally decided to venture out and do other things. We did the studio tour, which I have always loved, because I like seeing the behind the scenes stuff. We got to the sound stages where they film The Mindy Project and The Voice, and a bunch of other cool things. Later, we watched the Water World stunt show that Brandon was obsessed with, then just kind of walked around before going back to Wizarding World a little later. 

We called it a night before the park closed so that we could get plenty of rest before the long drive home the next day. We did the entire ten hour drive in roughly eleven hours, including bathroom/food breaks and traffic, so it really wasn't terrible. It was a great weekend, even though it was too short! And shout out to Jake and Alyssa for being so easy to travel with! Definitely makes for a fun vacation. We already can't wait to go back! 

A little surprise.

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Before we get to the meat of this post, no, the little nugget was not a surprise. I mean, he was, in some ways, but we won't get into those details.

What was a surprise, though, was our ultrasound appointment last week, when we found out that the baby is a boy!!! From the very beginning, Brandon and I both felt like it was a girl. And for a long time, I didn't have a preference on what we were having (still don't, by the way), but after feeling so strongly that it was a girl for long, it was definitely a shock to find out that we're having a boy. When we went shopping after the appointment, it was almost weird to be looking at boy things and not girl things. It still is sort of weird, to be honest. But we are extremely excited to have this little boy in our lives!

We just got home from California (post on that coming later), and baby is just as excited to be out of the car as I am. He is moving around so much! Which is probably an early sign of what he'll be like as a child...wildly energetic, just like his dad.

Hope everyone has had a fantastic Memorial Day/weekend, remembering those we've lost, and spending much needed time with family!

Second lunch.

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I think I've stated it before, but pregnancy is the weirdest thing. After we came out of the first trimester, I felt pretty good for a few weeks. To the point that sometimes I actually forgot I was pregnant, which makes me sound like a terrible pregnant lady, but it was actually kind of nice to not feel bloated or sick all the time. After I got back from Seattle, my little bump popped a bit. Apparently no one else can tell a difference (still), but I definitely can. I actually feel pregnant, which is just strange. I don't feel bloated or anything, but I can feel this new weight/pressure right around and below my belly button. It's super weird.

Something else that's new is the fact that I am hungry all the time. From weeks seven to twelve I ate a lot to keep myself from being sick, then I stopped being hungry for about five weeks, and now all of a sudden I am starving every single second of the day. Yesterday and today I had two lunches! They are small, but still! Two lunches seems like so much! But if it's what the baby wants, then the baby shall have it. We used to make smoothies every morning to take to work with us (see post here) but we had them every day for three weeks and I think they kind of got old. I guess I'll just have to figure out something else to keep me full!

This weekend we are headed to the happiest place on earth, and also the most magical place on earth (in my opinion)! We will spend tomorrow at Disneyland, and Sunday at Universal Studios seeing the Wizarding World of Harry Potter, California style. We are super stoked, but not super stoked about the long drive! 

We'll be posting the gender reveal sometime tomorrow (because it's only appropriate that we do it Disney style), so get ready!!

Cast your votes!

in

This weekend went by way too fast. We spent time with friends, went to a movie, did some shopping, and napped, twice. I always hate when weekends speed by, but I am so happy that Monday is finally over, and tomorrow is almost here! Tomorrow we find out the gender of our little nugget!! We've had the appointment set for a week and a half, but it has taken f  o  r  e  v  e  r.  I had a dream last night that we went to our appointment. Like, finished out the appointment, found out the gender and everything. I was so disappointed when I woke up. 

Anyway, we bought our first (costco-size) box of diapers yesterday to get us pumped for tomorrow. I am so excited to just know what we're having so we can start shopping! We have thought for a while now that baby is a girl, even though lots of people tell us the odds are against us since Brandon is one of four boys, but we're holding out hope! Actually, we just hope the baby is healthy, but I think we would be really shocked if it ends up being a boy. And we'd have a lot of apologizing to do, because I keep calling the babe "she." I've heard from my mom and grandma (and kind of my dad? he referred to the babe many times as both genders in the course of a few days), but I'm curious if anyone else thinks one way or the other for us. You'll all find out on Saturday!!

And for your entertainment, here's a baby picture of Brandon and myself.